how am i?

hello. it's been a long while. too long that i don't even know how to start writing again. so many things happened and until now, i'm still in high spirits. yes, despite the brain surgery i had and another trip to the operating room when the doctor confirmed that there's bleeding and they had to operate on me again. life is still sweet and surprisingly amazing even with detours here and there.

 how am i? well, the sutures had been removed three days ago, i.e. two weeks after my surgery. i still have numbness on one-sixth of my left parietal lobe, which is expected after the surgery. from time to time, i get mild headache and sharp pain where my incision was done. but all in all, i'm fine. my memory is improving each day (the first few days after my operation, i even forgot how to write my signature). my families and friends are happy that i recovered fast. my husband commended me for my bravery. and i'm going home to the philippines on wednesday. yipppeeee!!!!

we also had our good times before the surgery. my husband and i have like endless travels to new york, new jersey, pennsylvania, rhode island and massachusetts. we have relatives and friends who are very selfless for touring us around. without them, the daily trips will never be this enjoyable and memorable.

 for all these blessings, i praise the Lord for all his grace. truly, everything is his call :)

in between

go a distance or stay domisticated
stocking up for tomorrow or give them all away
piled up work or no work at all
stay alone or be in a throng
keep the diet or be more forgiving
be straight or stay out of the norm
be kinder or incriminate
talk less or be bold
take in or throw it aside.

in between. lost.

feeling light and young

i'm not fond of salons. i'm a happy bunny that can go out with sticky hair tied into a bun. i just don't care, i suppose. but this week is an exception as my friend is getting married by the end of the month. i need some hair-help like i don't need it before. so i gave myself a nice short haircut and darker hue (i prefer the lighter one, actually. but i guess the auntie put the wrong color, and suprisingly, i didn't make a fuss over it.) i feel literally lighter after getting rid of the limp hair. my housemates said i look like sixteen again. ha! had they seen me when i was sixteen, they would think i am much younger now.

so that's it. life is sweet and so is my look. =D

study, study, study

the discussion that transpired last night was pretty hefty. i slowly follow the charts and indicators. worst, i have only six nights to do my own research and catch up with next week's lesson.

ran-chi, my sit-in classmate and a former CIO in europe, had mused some words of consolation during our ride home. i didn't know that he just enrolled last year but talking to him sounds like he's so pro in his craft. i hope to be like him after a year, too. that is, only if i do my end of the bargain which is to study and study a bit more.

well, hopefully, things would start to get clearer in six nights because ran-chi said, we're still at the lighter part of the course. huh! (sigh...) good luck to me :P

changes

one day you're laughing, the next day, you're parting ways.
one day you're fighting, the next day, you're putting up with each other's insanity.
one day you're irritated, the next day, you're loving every moment.

changes.

every day you adapt to what life throws your way.
every day you accept that things are bound to twist.

like today. like any other day in the past.

grace's leaving

my dear cousin is leaving singapore for good. it makes me quite sad, the feeling i'm expecting to grow tomorrow when her last trace is finally out of our room. after two years of sharing a room, nail colors and so much more, the very girly and hilarious being will finally leave my sight... until april when i go back home.

i'll miss sms-ing her at night when she's not yet home. i'll miss waiting for her at orchard when i window-shop. the gossiping and chit-chat over coffee and pasta at coffee bean. the never-ending talk and laughs.

two months ago, i haven't really thought that she's leaving until she got pregnant. there's no really choice but to go home where she will be better taken care of.

the only really constant thing is change. but i reckon this is a good one. being a mother and a wife is most of the time, if not always, a better choice.

so good luck to the girl who never runs out of stories and comfort to tell!

paalam, tatay herminio

i can't remember how many times i saw tatay herminio. besides that time erodes my memory, there are really just a few times i saw him. probably three or four. or lesser than that. in the four years and a half that i could have the chance of chatting with him or seeing him more, i didn't. a choice that could be a little odd to look back now.

he was the father of my ex. the one with a twin brother. the one who's married to herminia. the man with a bullet rafting through his body caused by something i forgot what.

i honestly know very little about him. until a year ago, joel broke to me the news that he had cancer. and for a while i prayed for him. i prayed for nanay herminia, too. joel's often concern even before is how one will be able to cope with grief if the other is already gone. and from that simple regard, i know that tatay herminio and nanay herminia are one of the few couples i know who shared something really special.

and now that tatay is gone, i can feel the sorrows of his family even miles away. i remember his eyes which i only stared at photographs years ago. i remember joel's story about him accompanying nanay early in the morning to sell fish in the market. i remember him as a lolo to gelo in a handful of times i went to their home. i remember very little of what he was in the past. of what he was as a father. or just about anything about him. but perhaps big enough to reminisce the past and to remember him tonight.

tatay, the pain is gone now. have a peaceful rest.